Just as I Am
I ran across an old photo of myself as I was going through things in my closet. Looking at the photo and then glancing in the mirror as I closed the closet door, I grimaced. How my appearance had changed over the years.
I used to be one of the smallest, skinniest girls in school, and once even substituted a shoelace as a make-shift belt. It would take quite a few shoelaces to make a belt that would fit around my waist these days. Sigh.
The passage of time now displays itself freely on my body: gray (ahem, "silver") streaks, which now accent my once-blonde hair, vertical wrinkle lines that have taken up residence on my upper lip, and a waistline that resembles a Mama bear at Thanksgiving.
So much for my outer appearance. I wondered about my "inner" appearance--my soul, that is, if my soul were visible. Would it look much different now, than when I was young? I hoped so, for my faith journey started at a young age. I believed Jesus was my Savior then, and I still believe that now. Over the hills and valleys of life, I'd like to think my faith has grown over time.
If our soul actually has an "appearance," I'd like to imagine that mine is as full and plump as the size of my belly (these days), and would hope that it is brimming over with every fruit of the Spirit that it can hold. I'd like for my soul to be well-fed daily with the richest of Spiritual food. And just maybe its appearance might exceed the present circumference of my waist. No "shoe string" dieting" for me!
At my present age, there isn't a lot I can do to change my outer appearance, but I am grateful that God accepts me as I am, complete with imperfections inside and out. But as a forgiven child of God, I also know that every imperfection, every sin, is blotted out, and turned from dark and stained to as white as snow.
Today I ready myself for the day as I look in the mirror. I can't look back. I'll never look like that skinny little girl ever again. That was then. This is now.
Sometimes I feel uncertain about the changes that will take place in my body as the years go by. But I know there is one thing I can be certain of--God loves me just as I am. And He loves you, just as you are, too.
One consolation about aging. As I look back at the photo of myself when I was young, I can only hope that my soul is not as skinny as I was then. Ahhh, there's some recompense for aging--and for growing in faith, after all!
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